Ways to deal with Unsolicited Parenting Advice
If you follow my blog, you know that I read A LOT. Reading helps me analyze what choices I’m going to make for my family. Whether or not I should or shouldn’t do certain things. Although I don’t particularly follow one set of strict rules I do abide by some.
Although I’m a fairly holistic mama, I don’t condemn any parent for taking a different approach for your family. You know what is best for them and we all live differently. I don’t expect to be judged on my choices, which isn’t always the case but we move on.
So what do we do about that unsolicited advice?
It could be from your very nice neighbor, the cashier at your local grocery store, a mom from a play date or your own mama. I’m all for listening to certain things and I do my due diligence and check up on a lot of things I’m told.
Who knows? Maybe I am doing something wrong or I could improve on something.
We have to be willing!
I say accept the advice kindly. If it’s something absurd like your child should have soda at the age of 1 ( I don’t think anyone would say that but if they do) this would be the best response, thank you but we’ll pass.
That’s it! You don’t need to explain yourself or your choices to anyone. Unless you are harming your children, no one should make you ashamed of your choices.
I am strictly against circumcision, although I wouldn’t put a parent down for it (most are misinformed) and wouldn’t want to harm their baby in any way. But I do believe in not your body part not your choice. But certain people don’t think of it that way.
I used to get a lot of grief from people including my husband about my son’s bedtime and how I put him down. Although there is a TON of research out there that shows children with a set sleeping schedule and certain amount of hours do better in life, people always have to say something.
And you know what I do? I kindly pick up my kiddo and say it’s BEDTIME. Say goodnight to John, Mary & Sue. I think by now everyone knows how I am when it comes to his sleeping patterns and they let me be.
Eventually, they’ll let you be if it’s someone close to you.
We all have to deal with the choices we make in every aspect of life. Parenting isn’t any different.
You may also like: Co-Sleeping Revisited: Pros & Cons after Year 2
So just smile and say thanks!
But I couldn’t let you go without offering my own little piece of unsolicited parenting advice to you mom & dad. Yea I know, sorry! You can just say thanks & smile. But for real…
READ!
Not sure about something? Everyone does it, so it should be okay? READ! Don’t parent blindly, don’t do as you’re told. Be passionate about raising your children.
What is the best & your worst piece of parenting advice you’ve ever received? How much of it was unsolicited parenting advice Let me know in the comments below.
Want to know more about parenting style I follow? Check out this book by Drs. Sears.
Facebook | Instagram |Twitter | Pinterest
I agree that you just need to smile and say thanks, then just do what you feel is best.
You are right, why get upset? However, I try to steer away from giving advice unless I am asked.
I had a friend say, that the first time, he thanks them. If they say it a second time, he reminds them they've already told him. If they say it a third, he expresses that he wants the best for his family and it is disrespectful to repeat advice he hasn't asked for. I don't know that I have the guts to do that, but I do agree with his methods.
What if your mother in law never gets it, and keeps giving that advice?! 😉 ESPECIALLY about bedtime!
We definitely get a lot of interesting advice, especially with both adoption and twins in the mix! I grin and bear it most days, except when I finally blow! Haha. I love reading to and would love to know more of your recommendations! Sounds like a blog post! 😉
I think the key is reading and then digesting the information until you come up with the right formula for your family.